Monday, November 4, 2024

When employees just can't get along


Dan and Todd? They used to be best friends. But things got messy, and now they can't stand each other. Dan's ready to move on, but Todd? Not so much. Problem is, they work on the same team you manage, and now Dan's knocking on your door, hoping you'll step in and fix things.

Sure, you could tell them, "Just avoid each other and carry on." Sounds easy, right? Why make two people who aren't friends anymore work together if they don't want to? But here's the catch: avoiding this issue might be an easy short-term fix, but it's not a long-term solution that actually works. In most workplaces, people can't just steer clear of each other, especially if they need to interact on the daily.

So instead of hoping it all blows over, try these steps to get Dan and Todd back on the same page professionally—even if the friendship ship has sailed.

Step 1: Acknowledge the drama, privately. Don't cross your fingers and hope they'll magically "work it out." Have a quick, private chat with each of them to figure out what's going on. Listening to them (without playing favorites) shows them you're taking this seriously.

Step 2: Shift the focus to work goals. The end game? You want them thinking about work, not their personal beef. Remind them that the team has goals, and their collaboration matters for everyone's success (including their own).

Step 3: Set some ground rules. Lay down clear expectations for communication, respect, and behavior. They don't have to be besties, but they do need to keep it professional and act with respect. That way, everyone's on the same page.

Step 4: If it's still tense, bring in a mediator. Sometimes a neutral third party can get things out in the open, defuse the tension, and help them both refocus on moving forward.

Step 5: Keep an eye on things. Conflict resolution is never a "one and done." Check in now and then to make sure they're meeting expectations and catching any new issues early.

Bonus step: Document everything. Keep records of your conversations and any actions taken. If Todd's behavior begins to impact the team or work quality, documentation will support any future action you might need to take.

Bottom line: Telling them to avoid each other sounds easy, but it's not sustainable. By helping them work through this professionally, you're building a culture of respect and collaboration—and a stronger team all around.